Hect0rg
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The Friend Zone & Complicated Friendships
Hey everyone! So today, I didn't have the best of days and it kind of reminded me of about 2 years ago and it inspired me to write this thread today. So today, I am writing a thread about the ''Friend Zone'' and complicated friendships.
So let's get started, while writing this thread, I will be incorporating different of my stories and examples so you can better understand what I am trying to say!
Just to make this clear, I will be naming some of my friends after the first letter of their names, which will be A, V, and S.
So let's start off with the basics, what is the friend zone? So the friend zone in easy words is the level of friendship you obtain with a girl (it's usually a girl but can be the other way around as well) when you fail to impress her or you're just ''such good friends'' that a relationship would be impossible. Basically, one of the worst places to be, and one of the most heart breaking rejections.
So, let me start off with one of the worst friend zone stories I have ever had with someone. So back in the 8th grade, me and this girl, S, start talking, she wasn't a complete stranger since she went to my school and we had talked a few times back in 7th grade. I had this weird dream about her and for some reason I thought, ''If I had a dream about her, must mean I really like her'', so I went off of that weird assumption and started liking her. I liked her more and more to the point where I said screw it, I'm asking her out. At this point, she hadn't friend zoned me as when I asked her out she said yes. We kind of ''dated'' for about 1 week, even though we never went on a real date. After that we broke up and never spoke again in the 8th grade.
Moving onto 9th, first day of school, we found out that we sat together. It was kind of awkward at first until we came back from a 4k jog in gym class and just started talking again. We started texting again and BOOM, I find myself having another big crush on her. Back then I was a huge NOOB and didn't know what the friend zone was. So, I just said hey why not see if she likes me. I admit my affection for her, ask her out, she says ''I just don't see you that way'', we stop talking for about a month then for almost the whole year we were best friends, and I kind of started to find out my sexual orientation back then, but that's for a different thread.
Now that story was all to say that I was really sad (I don't want to say depression as it is nothing compared to REAL depression and I find when people say ''I was in depression'' sometimes just blow things out of proportion). So yeah, it sucked, I got over it and we started talking right?
Advice about the friend zone:
Yeah it sucks, it doesn't matter, think about the good side, that's one less problem on your list. Try to go out and find yourself another person, you are the most wonderful person, and if she rejected you because of the friend zone, well she's a loser and doesn't deserve such a great person like you, Try to get your mind of things, play MINECRAFT, CSGO, anything really! Get your mind off of the person, find someone else, and enjoy life without the struggles of doing that. There's really no cure, except going to see Doctor Hect0rg. In full honesty, I am experienced in these type of things, and if you want to talk to me, don't be shy! Inbox me, and we can set a time on ts, where we can chat, and hopefully make you feel better!
So that was it for the friend zone part, let's get onto the complicated friendships.
Now this topic is very diverse in how a friendship can be complicated and how to fix it, but here's a few examples of what can happen:
- Friend starts talking to another friend more than you.
- Friend starts dating someone and forgets about you
- Friend is talking in your back
- Friend changed schools or moved and you can't talk to them anymore
- Friend doesn't want to be your friend
So my friend A, we had been friends since 7th grade, and this is when I was in 9th grade. We dated in 7th grade for around half a year, didn't work out, broke up and yeah we became really good friends. When she started to get around 9th grade, she met this guy at the same school who was in 11th grade, and she got this massive crush on him. Problem was that she once talked to him before and her parents didn't really approve, and it didn't work out well last time.
But she started to talk to him again about 3 months after that whole period. They obviously liked each other. Mean while, me and T ( another friend ) hated this guy and knew all he wanted was to bang her, get some nudes and he was out. We tried telling her, but she was completely under his spell and there was no getting her out. She constantly took long to answer our texts because she was too busy texting HIM, she never could hang out with us, cause she had plans with HIM, she would change attitude and make us feel bad because OMG a guy who's 2 years older likes her. We knew something was wrong. So I kinda just slipped out of the image because she was constantly pushing me away, and I didn't really appreciate it, so I just left.
About a month later, the relationship had gotten to the point where they were sending each other intimate pictures and things were escalating. One day, she surprised him with this girl of his age kissing on the lockers and tears went down for several days. SO he had a hold of all her intimate photos and he's with another girl. She came running to me to apologize and I was obviously pissed and I told her ''I warned you, don't come crying to me about it honey'', and walked away. Later that evening I realized it was such a rude thing to say and texted her and we talked for a while. After that, well we're still really good friends and I'm really happy about it.
So my advice from that story? Things go to extremes, they could be good extremes, and bad extremes, but in the end, it always balances back to the middle. I'm not saying if you punch your friend in the face, it will balance out, we have to be reasonable, but I mean give it time, in the end the truth will come out. Also, I don't know how many times I've said it, but DON'T BE AFRAID TO TALK TO THEM ABOUT IT! It's the most important part in a friendship, COMMUNICATION!
So here's my final story. Remember S? Yeah so me and S were really good friends, and we were just in a good part of our friendship. Until I started to talk to people who have already been friends with her, and they realized she does anything to get attention, to use you, and is not afraid to ditch you to be popular. And that's exactly what I realized one day during gym class. She was talking to people she doesn't know ,that were the cool kids, even though I was obviously one of the cool kids. She started trashing me in front of them, and telling them intimate things about me and sending intimate pictures I sent her (no silly, not nudes, but you know, embarrassing pictures I wouldn't one the whole school to see), worst part is I was stuck with her and some other people for a project.
My advice for this story: Even though, we all want to give second chances, don't, cause I gave one to her and well, didn't work out too well either. When you know someone is doing something wrong, you'd better wake them up and tell them straight up ''I don't think this friendship is working out, I don't appreciate how you are treating me, and I don't want to be friends anymore'' It's so important to SAY WHAT YOU NEED TO SAY! Don't be afraid of them, why would you? Just saying the truth always makes your life so much easier.
Anyway, if I give out more of my embarrassing stories, might die of embarrassment, But hopefully this helped you a bit in life, and if you actually read all of this, well my sincere gratefulness, continue being awesome, and if you didn't, well, at least you clicked it!
I will be posting more of these life tips threads a lot if you guys enjoy them. If you need any help with life and want to talk to someone you can trust, well shoot me a DM on the forums, and we can setup a time on ts to talk and chat about life.
Anyways guys! Hopefully this wasn't too boring and I'll see you guys around! Ciao bambinos!
